You didn’t get one last week because I felt like murdering people.  To make up for it, I shall grace you with TWO recipes this week.  Don’t you feel lucky???  I know, you’re about to tinkle because the excitement is so overwhelming.  A note though – I haven’t tried either of these.  The excitement’s abated a little now right?  You’ll get over it.

So this week’s recipes are football-themed in light of the upcoming Super Bowl that somehow is still managing to take place despite the fact that the Saints aren’t in it.  I’m not sure how this is possible, but alas, it seems the show must go on.

The first is a recipe involving beer because the Super Bowl is a beer-drinking occasion.  Though, surprisingly, only the 8th biggest beer day of the year.  This disappoints me somehow.  I mean, HOW IS EASTER A BIGGER BEER-DRINKING OCCASION?  Riddle me that, my peeps.  Are the rednecks of the world getting up at 5am on Easter, cracking open a cold one and stumbling out of their trailers to hide eggs amongst the random car parts strewn in the front “lawn”?  Also, can I just tell you how many drinks involving beer have random names?  Like the Cream DeLa Splooge, Canadian Crippler, Pap Smear, Bea Arthur’s Underpants…I could go on, but I’ll spare you.  The Pap Smear I kind of get because it involves Pabst Blue Ribbon and Smirnoff vodka, but still – seriously people, who are the people that walk into a bar and order the Cream DeLa Splooge?  More than that…who would drink something (willingly) with “splooge” in the name?

Anyway, the drink I chose is called the Boiling Sunrise.  Probably because if you drink too much and have to go to work the following Monday, the sunrise really DOES feel like it’s boiling.  You will need the following:

  • 6 oz beer (I prefer our local Abita as it doesn’t taste like panther piss)
  • 2 oz tequila
  • 4 oz orange juice
  • 1 oz grenadine

Shake the OJ, tequila and grenadine in a pitcher with ice, then stir in the beer.  This drink reminds me of the Skip ‘n Go Naked I used as the DRW a while back.  I’m betting you could probably manage to alter the proportions and turn this into a punch.  I refuse to do that for you because 1) I’m lazy and 2) I hate math.

SO.  Onto the second recipe.  This one is called The Touchdown.  You could probably turn this into a drinking game by downing said cocktail every time your team scores or the other team scores (depending upon your mood).  You will need the following:

  • 4 oz bourbon (you know my fave)
  • 8 oz lemonade
  • 8 oz unsweetened iced tea

Combine the bourbon with the iced tea in a shaker filled with ice.  Stir until cold then strain equal parts into two glasses filled with ice.  Top with lemonade.  This recipe makes two 12-ounce servings.  Or one 24 ounce serving.  If your team is losing I suspect this beverage may help ease your pain.  Until Monday morning.

So there you go peeps.  Two recipes for your Super Bowl weekend imbibing pleasure.  Enjoy it.  Because college football doesn’t start back up until September 3rd, when LSU plays Oregon.