Greta is four.  Now I know people say, “Oh, she’s four going on **insert older age here**” all the time.  But Greta is straight up LEGIT.  My favorite quotes were as follows:

Breathlessly stating, “I love diamonds.”  After asking to see my “married rings.”  This was closely followed by, “I have to poo poo.”

Also, while deciding what to wear to lunch, Greta told her mom she wanted to wear a dress but was concerned that whatever dress I would be wearing would be much more beautiful.  I died hearing this because I loathe wearing dresses.

Clearly, the kid doesn’t know me very well.  But she will.  When Greta (along with all the other children of my close friends and relatives) gets old enough – Aunt Mary will take her to Galatoire’s on a Friday and let her have her first glass of champagne.  And maybe a cigarette.  I dunno.  We’ll play it by ear.